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{part 1}

So, I’ve had big epiphany recently.

Well, rather, a series of small epiphanies, that can kinda connect together to make one big epiphany. Still with me?

Because, my senses tell me, you might be able to relate.

Let’s back up a little….

A few years ago, I’d taken a course to learn how to (FINALLY) take my camera off of auto mode, and onto manual mode. *I use caps for FINALLY, because I’d been in auto mode for approx. 6 years. #betterlatethannever

So. I’d been busy, loving my good self with my new skills. And at the same time, a little part of my brain started tinkering with the idea of starting a business.

BUT. I didn’t actually know whether that business should be a photography business.

Maybe I could sell gorgeous children’s clothes? Maybe I could open a book store? Maybe I could drop ship exotic homewares to people who live in fancy pants houses. Hmmm.

I mentioned to my photography mentor something that had been playing on my mind…here’s the abridged version –

“I'm not sure if I can start a photography business. I mean, it's my ART. And I'd be putting it out there for people to see, and judge. It literally feels like putting a piece of my heart out there, into the wide world, in front of EVERYONE. How could I possibly do that??”
~ me
“Yes it absolutely can feel like that for most of us who put any of our creations in front of the eyes of others - especially if you're taking it to the next level of creating those pieces of art for paying clients. It's a vulnerable space to be in, and only you can know whether you want to share your work, or keep it to yourself”
~ my first photography mentor

Wise words. At this point, I could now wax lyrical to you on how one of the greatest pleasures of art being brought into existence, is that it can be shared, and bring joy and meaning to others. etc, etc. *which is true, of course.

But what I want to start the conversation on, is how that feeling, that vulnerable, doubtful feeling, can still come and go, even as we improve our skills, work with more clients, tweak our systems, work on our comparison-itis….For most of us, it still rears it’s head from time to time. And for some of us, way more often than we’d like.

And for me personally? It’s been quite the loud talker amongst my mind chatter, since I started this #journey.

Oh, and the epiphany part?

I’ve come to realise that so much, SO much, of this feeling for me (and I’m betting for others too. Actually I’ve HEARD this time and time again from other photogs, either in conversation, or their comments in FB groups, or Insta posts) comes back to CONFIDENCE.

Not, however, confidence in the sense of –

‘I do my hair toss, check my nails, baby how you feelin'? (feelin' good as he-eell) 💃🏼
~ Lizzo

Confidence as in:

~ your mindset

~your self worth

~ your feelings of being enough (good enough/smart enough/pretty enough/cool enough/innovative enough/creative enough/experienced enough #ETCETERA)

So, now….I’d LOVE to know if you can relate?

*if you don’t, then kudos to you, fabulous work! Seriously, I’m giving you a virtual high five 🖐🏻

But if you do? What I want you to know is:

  1. You are NOT alone in these feelings, and
  2. You can do something about it (& high five to you for any resulting epiphanies of your own! 🖐🏻) woohooo 🙌🏻
Thoughts so far? Let me know! Leave a comment, send me an email, whatever blows your hair back. Just start the conversation, even if it's with yourself.
tania x
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